LOST

Gumption is one of those character traits that ebbs and flows for me. Meaning that, to be blunt. I'm either going to do something full out or only feign attempt the doing of something. Take this blog for example. It's been weeks since I posted something. Now its not that I haven't had idle time in theses weeks or that I got busy with something of far higher importance. Its simply that I didn't sit and type. There was nothing in my life that needed to be hashed out on the keyboard. Still I wrote and and wrote and drew a multitude of things. I suppose my wrists needed the work out. I just find it hard sometimes to follow one course. This could be blamed on my birth year (1987);my generations complacency in a surplus that has now turned in on its self and given rise to a generation of creative people who are bored with the passing of time (or simply have no job to get up and go to). Now there are still doers in this generation but there's a lot of boredom to go around. Where am I going with this? It has little to do with the geography of ones generation, by geography I mean the social, political and economic climate of ones  birth, but rather the individuals gumption to follow the leader or the majority to produce and reproduce products. Oh that's it I just have no product, well no that's a silly inclination because regardless of what or how I spend my time it still produces something at the minimal amount of human waste. Is it that my product isn't profitable? Well human waste isn't worth much. But there's words, there's no money attached to them. (Then again I like it that way, I don't think ones thoughts should have a dollar amount attached to them) but the older I get the more I realize the undeniable need and desire for money. Hell even Nietzsche made something off his thoughts.What I'm getting at is with all of this time and motion on our hands, is one ever  truly without something to do? Breathing comes to mind, its not something we have to think to do, yet we still have to remind ourselves to stop and smell the roses. At the end of it, in my opinion, it all comes down to choice or Gumption. You either have it or you don't and when you don't have it the only thing you can focus on is getting some in your pocket so you can nab that job, or ask the girl who serves you your coffee every morning out on a date, or to finally move out of your parents sphere of influence and begin making decision based upon your own judgement of given circumstances. It all takes this silly trinket called Gumption and I could just cry for all of the times that I thought I had it and only realized I left it in my other pair of pants. In closing I impart onto those or all of us who struggle with having too much or none at all (which is really what this post is about) to look within in yourself or if that's too scary look around you. No one, not one person alive is sure of every single decision or action that they do 100% of the time. It's impossible. What is Possible is to become lost in trying to figure out why you're unsure, my advice is to say to hell with insecurity and assert yourself where and when you're needed or desired. The worst thing you'll hear is a 'no' or 'not this time kiddo' but at least you'll rest assured knowing that you had the salt to gave it a shot.